Knowing your worth as a dancer

Knowing your worth as a dancer is always important. I always believe that you should see yourself in your own way and not in how others see you. I think being a dancer this is one of the hardest things. We are taught in class to be obedient, listen and to absorb, and we are told not to hold back during during rehearsals and shows.

There will always be someone better that is true, and for the past 22 or so years I’ve had to learn this the hard way. That there is enough sunshine for everyone, but you should believe that if you work hard enough (like really work, eat breathe live dance) you deserve your piece of sunshine too and don’t be afraid to show that you do. ❤️

Picture taken during my performance last summer as Paquita by Miguel Antonio Gonzales

Why a lot of your dance friends will remain with you for life

Bad turning days. Glitter. Everywhere. Sticky floor. Sore muscles. “One more time”  is always a Lie.

Who else can understand your “Dancers Problems” but your dance friends. Your dance friends or ballet friends, whichever you may prefer to call them. Is what I would call, your ALL IN ONE kinda friends. All in one because they can relate to your normal human problems and they can also relate your problems in dance. (Like you have much human problems right? we hardly have lives outside of ballet)


In between tons of shows with Mishkaela, Ate Henry and Ate Isay, 2008


Staying at the ballet dorm during summers and ordering unhealthy food. Such as Pizza and around 5 Large McDo fries.


The chaos before a show


My best ballet friend and still my best friend ever

As we dancers all know. Dancing is really a love hate thing. I’m pretty sure whether you are gifted or not. We all go through the hating and loving process of this art form. One minute we’re all happy and spreading the weird vibes and the next minute we start the waterworks. Most times, it just drives me nuts.

Your dance friends are those you can be weird around, you don’t mind quick changing in front of or letting loose with. They stick with you through the hard times and of course the good times. There will be those who talk behind your back and those who tell you upfront that you’re not good. You will meet a variety of different people and personalities while dancing, so don’t take it personally when someone says something bad about you. It’s really like that in dance. You’re going to have to learn to ignore those comments and laugh them off.

I love my dance friends. I have the moody friend, the hardworking friend, the artistic friend, the friend who does everyone’s make up, the friend who does everyone’s hair, the perky friend, the whiny friend, the gifted friend, the emotional friend, the nosy friend, the chismosa friend, the sister of the group, the wacky friend, the super flexible friend, the all around talented kind of friend and just all kinds of friends. Dance friends are always so interesting. So if you’re a normal human, you should try having a ballet dancer as a friend. You may not be able to relate to his or her “dancers problems” but I’m sure you’ll have a fun time. Take note though that not all dancers are nice, but most of the friends that I have made are. (So choose your dance friends wisely)

Ballet is so emotionally and physically tiring that you really will need a dance friend to keep you company. I know that you dance for yourself, but it would be easier for you to have a good dance friend to be there for one another. The friends who will pose with you in the middle of streets, help you do your make up and be tough with you when you cry. They will be your all in one and all around best friends. Even when you aren’t dancing anymore, you will have that same connection.

So here’s a shout out to all the dancers, co dancers, and ex co dancers out there who I have danced together with. I will always remember the good times we’ve had. I hope that someday we could all share the stage together again.


Summer 2014, Right before our show

Backstage, CCP main theatre

Everything is beautiful at the ballet (from an audiences perspective) but everything is chaotic backstage. I’m just not used to the normal dancers life anymore.

I forgot how it was to stay long hours in the theater. Not seeing much daylight. The feeling of always being in a studio or in the theater. The feeling that I once loved and maybe still do love.

Click on the image for the full size.


Before class


During class


After Class

It’s really something special when you’re backstage, because you get to see everything. The sequins all over the floor. Sweat EVERYWHERE. Dancers screaming once they step out of the stage as soon as they exit the wings. The chaos of putting make up, the communal hairspray being passed around to everyone. The death of my pointe shoes by the coffee that was beside my bag last night. (sad but, it’s about time I guess) I am so thankful that I still get to experience this.

Whenever I’m backstage, I forget the time. I forget that there is a world outside of this, it is one of the reasons why I fell in love with dancing. As I get to feel this again, I wish to enjoy every moment of what is left of it.